How have you been? I have mostly been thinking about how perfect it is that Cara Delevingne purchased Jimmy Fallon’s house and it will continue to be a place ghosts laugh because they fear what will happen if they don’t.
You can see what it looks like before Delevingne inevitably installs gumball machines shaped like ovaries.
BUT I must inform you that Bradley Cooper is at it again!
Before we begin, I will share with you the thing that makes me happiest in the world, Bradley Cooper enjoying a Starbucks iced tea while filming the Leonard Bernstein biopic Maestro in Central Park.
Check out those silver linings!
After reading Lolita in the park with Suki Waterhouse, the actor is allegedly dating Clinton aide Huma Abedin, Anthony Weiner’s former spouse.
According to Page Six, Anna Wintour played matchmaker, “She’s BFFs with Bradley and adores Huma.” I cannot imagine what being BFFs with Anna Wintour is like, but I suppose if anyone’s up for the job, it’s Aloha star Bradley Cooper.
Huma Abedin is one of few people on the planet that might find Bradley Cooper to be a relaxing change of pace. Plus, I bet she’s very good at tuning out people practicing speeches in the mirror while she brushes her teeth, which I imagine will come in handy.
It seems Cooper just wanted to take another look at her, because they have seem to be far from the shallow now. The couple apparently both attended the Met Gala (as did Cooper’s ex Irina Shayk), but arrived separately.
According to the Post, Cooper broke up with Glee star Dianna Agron to date Abedin. Agron was previously married to the former banjo player of Mumford & Sons, Winston Marshall, who got really into Jordan Peterson and left the band to focus on “free speech.” He has a podcast called Marshall Matters now, so unfortunately, getting dumped by Bradley Cooper is what counts as an upgrade for Agron. Trissues wishes her well.
As for Cooper and Abedin, Page Six says they have a lot in common! “They are perfect for each other,” according to a source. “They’re both into power and politics and human affairs.”
In addition to power, politics, and human affairs, they both love movies. In her memoir, Abedin wrote that she and Wintour went to movies together while she was recovering from her heartbreak.
They’ve also both been in movies! Abedin was heavily featured in the 2016 documentary Weiner following her then-husband’s unsuccessful run for mayor of New York City after resigning from Congress in the wake of his first of several sexting scandals. Congrasha on divorcing that terrifying, incorrigible man, Huma.
I cannot wait to cherish every single far-fetched rumor about Lady Gaga being jealous of the couple!
xoxo, trackson traine